Choices Read online

  CHOICES

  By

  Teresa Federici

  Copyright © 2013 Teresa Federici

  All rights reserved

  No part of this book may be reproduced, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without express written permission of the publisher or author.

  Contact Teresa via Email at [email protected]

  Or visit her website at:

  www.teresafederici.com

  Contents

  1. Chapter One

  2. Chapter Two

  3. Chapter Three

  4. Chapter Four

  5. Chapter Five

  6. Chapter Six

  7. Chapter Seven

  8. Chapter Eight

  9. Chapter Nine

  10. Chapter Ten

  11. Chapter Eleven

  Epilogue

  To Tommy and Zane – the most important men in my life.

  Chapter One

  Don’t look back, that’s how Lot’s wife turned to salt, Abby Stanford thought to herself as she glanced in her rearview mirror at the receding Boston skyline. She turned her attention to the long road ahead of her. The Massachusetts turnpike stretched in a long unbroken line, eventually entering New York State and becoming the Thruway. This would turn into I-90 somewhere in the west, leading her to Bozeman, Montana. A long drive to make on her own, over 2200 miles, but she needed the time to think. She wasn’t running away, exactly, just taking a small vacation. Her divorce had been a long, drawn out process that had left her shattered, mourning the end of one chapter in her life.

  She found the small cabin for rent on the internet that morning, and had promptly called to see if was available. It had been, and she had booked it for two weeks. Then she had packed most of what she owned and thrown it all into her Range Rover and got behind the wheel.

  The bastard had cheated on her! It was like a bad, predictable play. High society doctor cheats on his high society wife. Who couldn’t have seen that coming? Obviously not Abby. They hadn’t started out high society; well, Abby hadn’t. She and Steve had met at Harvard, he in med school, and Abby just beginning pre-Law. She was a small town girl from White Fish, Montana and he was from old-money Boston blue bloods. She had dreamed of fighting environmental injustices and he only wanted a beautiful trophy wife.

  Abby fit the bill exactly. Petite, only a little over 5 feet, she looked almost fragile. She had dark auburn hair with brilliant green eyes, and her face was perfectly heart-shaped. She moved gracefully, and had a natural warmth about her that drew people to her. She was also stubborn as a mule. Steve found that out after he proposed. He wanted her to drop out of school immediately after they were wed, but Abby adamantly insisted that she get her law degree. Steve argued that she had already gotten her a degree in wildlife biology, so why did she need a law degree too? He accused her of thinking only of her career. She called him a chauvinist pig. They screamed and yelled, then made frenzied love on her apartment floor. Abby got her law degree, but never took her bar exams.

  They had gotten married right after her graduation. Steve, already in residency, started on the fast track at Boston Medical Center. They struggled some, but not much. Steve came from money, and Abby had the inherent frugality that came from being a rancher’s daughter. They had great times in the beginning, but Abby had always felt that she wasn’t doing anything, had no purpose, so she started joining committees and volunteering her time at various charities. From there, it seemed they never had time for each other. Steve devoted all his time to the hospital, and she filled up her empty hours with social get-togethers thinly disguised as charitable works. That’s when it all went to shit, Abby thought morosely, we didn’t have a marriage anymore; we had a façade.

  Abby turned her attention back to the present. She was running west, trying to make sense out of her life. She should go to her parents in White Fish, but she just couldn’t bring herself to run to them. They had raised her to be independent and to think for herself. She couldn’t hide in Montana forever, but she could take some time, finally, for herself. How the last years of her marriage played out was definitely something out of a Neil Simon movie about society marriages.

  Well, this girl wasn’t from society. She was a country girl, raised on barn dances and potluck church dinners, although she hadn’t been to church since she was 17. She knew marriage to be two people helping each other, and growing together, two people who loved the other one more than a stupid career.

  She passed a sign telling her she was entering Ohio, and felt the same little pang in her heart that she had felt when she had entered New York state and Pennsylvania. She had hoped that every state she had gone through would have eased the pain of missing Steve, but this pang was a strong as the other two had been. Was she being too romantic? She didn’t think so. Did she still love Steve? She wasn’t too sure. Right now, she would like to crack him across the head with a frying pan, but it was probably just her pride that was making her think that. She had to clear away the hurt and humility she was feeling and get down to her real feelings, and then make a decision.

  Shaking herself out of her mental reverie, she drove on, following the setting sun. It was almost another cliché in a short life of cliché’s; Go west young woman and build a new life. Did she want to start over out west, or go back to life in Boston, where she knew what to expect? Boston was predictable, she could take her bar exams, get in with a decent firm, and buy a new place where there were no memories of her and Steve. She didn’t belong out west anymore, had become too much of a city girl. She liked the conveniences of city life, walking to the coffee shop in the morning, museums, art galleries, and all the other trappings that came with living close in to downtown. Ranch life was great to visit, but cities out west hadn’t caught up with the sophistication of east coast cities.

  Her stomach rumbled, making her aware that she hadn’t eaten since breakfast and it was now five o’clock. The sun was setting, and soon it would be dark, and she needed to stop and get a hotel and some food. She swore to herself that she wouldn’t think any more about what to do with her life until she got to her destination, which was another 1500 miles and 2 more days of driving. She didn’t have much faith in her willpower to not think about it.

  Abby pulled her SUV to stop in front of the farm house that served as the home and office of LM ranch. It was a beautiful home, a log and stone creation that blended into the surrounding countryside as if God himself had planted it there. It glistened in the fall of new snow, looking almost brand new. Abby hadn’t been in the west since the year after she was married, maybe because Steve didn’t want to be reminded he married a cattle rancher’s daughter. Abby had forgotten how stunning the scenery was, even in winter. The mountains changed color throughout the day, from black to purple to the pink of alpenglow. Evergreen trees with their white dressings of snow, emerald green branches peeking through.

  Vaguely, she thought about Valentine’s Day in two weeks, and snorted. What a way to spend the most romantic holiday of the year, holed up in a cabin in the woods, trying to rebuild her life after the end of her marriage. It was like a big cosmic joke. Well, she was no quitter, and she would bounce back from this. She flipped down the vanity mirror and looked at herself in it. Not too bad for driving 2200 miles, she thought. She had pushed herself too hard, driving almost 800 miles a day. She ran her fingers through her long hair, shaking it so the natural waves came out. Her green eyes glittered from unshed tears, so much for her resolve not to think about her failed marriage as she drove, and there were faint shadows under them, but nothing that a couple days of sleep wouldn’t cure.

  Opening the door, she stepped out and stretched, arms up over her hea
d, then bending down to touch her toes. She heard a rattle and straightened up quickly, looking around for the source of the sound. Two men, mounted on horses, had come around the corner of the house, and were staring at her.

  “Hello, am I at the right place to check into the cabin?” she asked, raising her hand in a wave. Neither one of them spoke, and were staring quite rudely. Abby stared right back. How rude.

  “Is this the LM Ranch?” she tried again. The smaller of the two blinked.

  “Can you help me?” she said, speaking slowly. The bigger man, about a decade older than the smaller man, tipped his cowboy hat and winked.

  “Sorry ma’am, we’re just not used to seeing the likes of you out here. You kinda startled us. My name is Ben Frazier, and I’m the manager here. Would you be Abby Stanford?” Ben asked, leaning over his saddle horn.

  Abby wondered what he meant when he said “the likes of you” but decided to let it pass.

  “Yes, I’m Abby Stanford. Do I just go into the house to check in?” Abby replied, gesturing toward the house. Had she been away from ranchers for so long she forgot how they acted? Ben just nodded, and he and Small One wheeled their horses around and disappeared around the corner of the house from where they came from. Abby stood in the gently falling snow and wondered at their behavior. Maybe they just don’t see that many females, she thought as she walked around to the back of the truck to get out her bags.

  “Hey, Logan, I think your guest is here.”

  Logan MacKinnon looked up from his computer and glanced over to where Kassey Frazier was looking out the front window. Kassey looked back at him, her face lit up in a big smile.

  “What are you smiling about?” Logan asked, a hint of a smile playing around the edges of his mouth.

  “Oh she’s going to cause trouble. I can already tell.”

  Logan thought that a bit cryptic and moved to the window next to where Kassey stood. He glanced once, turned away, and then spun back around.

  It was a Vision, had to be. There was nothing on God’s green earth that looked like that. She stood outside, looking around, a pile of luggage at her feet. She wore a pair of jeans that were cut in the current style, sitting low around her waist, a pair of hiking boots on her feet. Not cheap ones, either. She only had a short jacket on, like a blazer almost, and her long auburn hair tumbled down her back in a wavy waterfall. Her face was all cream and rose, shaped in a perfect heart. He wondered vaguely what color her eyes were, then shook himself mentally. He wondered what he would get done while she was here. Trouble, with a capital T.

  “I didn’t think women looked like that in real life” Logan commented in what he hoped was his normal speaking voice, and heard Kassie snort behind him.

  “Get your mind out of your pants! She’s just a woman, probably snooty too. She ain’t even dressed for winter. Look at her.” Kassey huffed, reaching a hand to her own blonde locks self-consciously.

  Logan couldn’t stop looking at her. His usual self-control had vanished. He had seen, and been with, many a beautiful woman, but this one was different. There was something about her that turned his mind into a blank slate.

  “You might want to quit fogging up the window, Chief, here she comes” Kassey grumbled, smacking Logan on the shoulder.

  Logan took a step away from the window and walked back to his computer. He turned his attention to his computer screen, but kept one eye on the door. He watched Kassey sit back down in her receptionist chair, where she did double duty as his secretary and lodging manager.

  The bell above the door jingled, and then she walked in, huffing a little with her luggage strapped all around her, two bags in her hand, and a garment bag and laptop case strapped around her neck. He thought it made her more human, albeit a human Vision. He tried to ignore her, hoping that he wouldn’t be needed to help out. Logan prided himself on his self-control and ability to keep cool when all else around him is in chaos, but this one very petite woman had stripped him of that, and he struggled to get his thoughts under control.

  Abby shrugged her bags off her body and stopped in front of what she assumed was a check-in desk. A very pretty blonde sat in the chair behind the desk, almost pointedly ignoring Abby. That can’t be right, she thought, I just got here, why would she want to ignore me? She cleared her throat and said “Excuse me?”

  The blonde swung her head around as if just noticing Abby, and gave her a smile.

  “Can I help you?” the blonde asked.

  “Yes, I’m Abby Stanford, I have a reservation for your cabin.”

  “Oh yes, Mrs. Stanford, we’ve been expecting you and your husband!” Kassey exclaimed, a little too loudly. Abby smiled a little, puzzled at her loud tone.

  “No, no husband, and no longer a Mrs. Not married at all, actually.” she offered, a little bitterness creeping into her voice. This seemed to cause the woman to look a little disgruntled. What in the world had she walked into?

  “Let’s get you checked in, shall we?” Kassey turned back to her computer, and Abby saw her shoot a look at a man sitting at another computer. His back was turned to her, but he had a presence about him that spoke to Abby. She wished he would turn around so she could see his face, but he seemed to be concentrating on something on his computer. He hadn’t turned around when she had walked in, but he didn’t seem busy. His long fingers rested on the key board, but he wasn’t typing. He was either very tall, or had a long torso, his back was straight under his blue denim shirt and his legs were encased in a pair of Wrangler jeans. Long legs, she noticed, along with a long torso. Very tall. His hair was black, and curled a little at his collar. Abby turned her attention back to the blonde.

  “My name is Kassey Frazier, and I’m sorta the maître’d here at LM Ranch. I run the front office and I’m who you call when you need something. We don’t offer maid service or room service and we don’t have a spa. You have to go into Bozeman for that, an hour west of here.” Kassey took a breath and continued “If you need extra towels, I can get that for you, but there is a washer and dryer in your unit. The nearest grocery store is in Livingston, and that’s half an hour from here, so you should really get everything you’re gonna need in one shot. You wouldn’t want to get caught out—“

  Abby held up a hand and Kassey stopped speaking and raised an eyebrow. Abby wondered what she had done to deserve the hostility she felt radiating from the woman, but she wouldn’t stand for it.

  “I don’t know if this is how you treat your guests when they check in, but I read your web-site. I know there aren’t any spa facilities, or maid service or anything else that a five-star lodging would provide. I’m guessing that’s what you’re getting at, right? If I wanted five-star, I would’ve stayed in five-star. Is that okay with you?” Abby replied, propping the hand she help up on her hip.

  A snort came from the man in the corner, and Kassey looked a little contrite. She seemed to gather herself and began again.

  “I’m sorry, there was no excuse for my behavior. We don’t get a lot of city folk out here. Everyone that comes in like you, doesn’t realize that we’re just a place to unwind naturally. No fancy amenities.” Kassey apologized, but Abby still felt a challenge there, but she decided to let it go. She really just wanted to wipe the road grime away and then fall asleep for a long time, preferably for the rest of her life.

  “I promise that I won’t be a snotty bother. If I break a nail, I’ll make sure to call 911 from my cell phone, instead of bothering you.” Abby couldn’t help getting in a parting shot. Kassey opened her mouth to come back, but there was a discreet cough from the corner so Kassey closed her mouth again. She took the cabin key from a peg on the wall next to her desk, and took out the necessary forms for Abby to sign from her desk. She put them on the desk and handed Abby a pen to sign.

  “Do you need help out with your luggage?” Kassey asked, taking the signed forms back and filing them.

  “No, I can handle it fine. How do I get to the cabin?” She bent down to her luggage, gathering it
up.

  “Well, with the fresh snow on the ground the track is covered up, so I’ll have to call in one of the guys to come around to show you out there.” Kassey replied, reaching over to grab her two-way radio.

  “I’ll take her”

  Abby stopped at the sound of his voice and looked up at the man in the corner. He finally spoke, and he had a nice voice, a little rough, with the cadence of the west. She watched as he stood up and grabbed his grabbed his straw Stetson from the coat stand next to his desk. Settling the hat on his head, he turned around, and Abby felt as though she was falling through the floor. He was gorgeous, no other way to put it.

  Tall, at least a foot taller than her own 5’3, the legs she had admired as he had sat at his desk seemed to go on forever. His denim shirt encased a torso that was not formed by thirty minutes a day at the gym, but from honest hard work. Abby realized she was staring, and quickly looked away, but not before she saw his face. Sculpted, it seemed, from the wind and sun, he had a strong jaw line and high cheekbones, framing a rugged mouth and a straight nose. His eyes had looked gray, like a high mountain lake but she couldn’t be sure. She would have to look again to be sure.

  He walked over to her and stuck out his hand. Abby looked at it, wondering what she should do with it. Her brain seemed to have stopped working. Get a grip Abby! She shook herself mentally, and placed her hand in his. He shook it and let it go, but all she felt was his calloused palm and how it sent shivers up her arm.

  “I’m Logan MacKinnon. Nice to meet you, Ms. Stanford.” Logan said, tucking his hand into his front pocket. Touching her had sent a jolt straight up his arm and into his stomach. He cursed at himself. She was a guest, and here he was reacting like a school boy on his first date.

  “Please, call me Abby. Logan MacKinnon? I guess this is your ranch?”

  “Yeah, my little home.” He shrugged, still feeling uncomfortable. He hadn’t liked Kassey’s attitude toward her, but she did look like she belonged in some big city with fancy boutiques, not alone on his ranch.